David’s Wives: Hearts Devoted to a King {Part 2}

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Wise Abigail

In the meantime, David enters the wilderness of Paran and goes into the town of Maon (Maw-own) (near the region of Judah), with hopes to refresh himself and his men. 1 Samuel 25

Here’s a map showing Maon at the southern-most tip of Dead Sea.

David ot_israel-flat (Maon)

David and his men come to the home of a man named Nabal. 25:3 says,

Now the name of the man was Nabal, and the name of his wife Abigail. The woman was discerning and beautiful, but the man was harsh and badly behaved; he was a Calebite.”

Discerning, beautiful Abigail! Her name meant “my father’s joy” or “my father is joy”. And she sure is a joy to read about!! How did she end up with foolish, boorish, Nabal?

A footnote in my ESV said “Sheepshearing was a time of festivity (v. 8) as well as work.” There would have been LOTS of food, and because this man was clearly wealthy, he would have been able to afford the food David and his men needed. In addition, David and his men had helped Nabal’s shepherds, so he was asking for a simple “thank you” for their protection.

This should have been a simple exchange of hospitality.

At this point in the narrative, David had at least 600 men with him (1 Sam 23:13). He started out with 400 men who had come to him at the Cave of Adullam (Ah-doo-lum), the location he escaped to after fleeing from the Philistine lord at Gath.

Cave of Adullam

Cave of Adullam

1 Sam 22:1-2 says,

David departed from there and escaped to the cave of  Adullam. And when his brothers and all his father’s house heard it, they went down there to him. And everyone who was in distress, and everyone who was in debt, and everyone who was bitter in soulgathered to him. And he became commander over them. And there were with him about four hundred men.”

I love the image of David with all these people in their desperation flocking to him. God presented him with a ministry to the distressed and bitter because he was a man on the run, distressed and fearing for his life. And God worked through his circumstances, providing David with a group of people who eventually become more-or-less his bodyguard! A mutually beneficial arrangement. More evidence of God’s presence in his life.

Needless to say, feeding 600 men would have been a huge task! But he doesn’t ask for anything but what he has “at hand” (v. 8). You read Nabal’s response, it was littered with disrespect and anything BUT hospitality. It’s no wonder one of the young men go to Abigail:

But one of the young men told Abigail, Nabal’s wife, “Behold, David sent messengers out of the wilderness to greet our master, and he railed at them.” (v. 14)

He goes on to affirm that David and his men were good to them and that they were kept safe at their hands (v. 15-16).

Abigail got to work immediately, grabbing as much as she could, most likely from the feast tables. (v. 18) It says in v. 19 “But she did not tell her husband Nabal.”

She acted wisely to save the life of her husband whom everyone, including herself, believed was a “worthless” man (v. 17). He was not deserving of her gracious act, yet she does it anyway. What a loyal and honorable woman she was!

She sends the young men on ahead of her with all the food (a peace offering!) and as she comes to him, we see her get down off of her donkey very quickly to assume that position of humility, falling at his feet, bowing to the ground (v. 23). These are two distinct actions. The falling indicates the prostrating of oneself, but the bowing to the ground indicates that she would have gotten as low as she could, pressing her face into the ground. This would have been the most humble, most vulnerable position one could put herself into. How brave this woman must have been to approach the hopping mad David, surrounded by his 400 fighting men, all with swords strapped on their belts. YIKES!

As I thought about her response, I couldn’t help but wonder what’s the quickest way to dissolve someone’s anger? As you read Abigail’s response, you’re reading about the master of diffusing anger. What is more startling though is her opening dialogue in 1 Sam 25:24-25,

On me alone, my lord, be the guilt. Please let your servant speak in your ears, and hear the words of your servant. 25Let not my lord regard this worthless fellow, Nabal, for as his name is, so is he. Nabal is his name, and folly is with him.”

This seems rather like how a person would approach a king, begging for mercy to even be allowed to speak to him. And SHE takes the blame for what happened!

What she says next is so remarkable to me as she seems to prophesy over him. For she says (1 Sam 25:28-31):

Please forgive the trespass of your servant. For the Lord will certainly make my lord a sure house, because my lord is fighting the battles of the Lord, and evil shall not be found in you so long as you live. 29 If men rise up to pursue you and to seek your life, the life of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of the living in the care of the Lord your God. And the lives of your enemies he shall sling out as from the hollow of a sling. 30 And when the Lord has done to my lord according to all the good that he has spoken concerning you and has appointed you prince over Israel31 my lord shall have no cause of grief or pangs of conscience for having shed blood without cause…”

She then asks him to remember her, your servant.

She has predicted his coronation as king, yet the covenant that God makes with David DOES NOT HAPPEN until 2 Samuel 7:8-16!! It appears as though she is foretelling what is to come! And David being anointed as king (after God had rejected Saul) seemed to be a very private matter, something that took place at his home in front of his father, Jesse and his 7 older brothers! (1 Sam 16:1-13). Had David spread the word about his anointing? It doesn’t appear that he ever said anything about that first anointing, and besides he continues to refer to Saul as “the Lord’s anointed”. So how could she have known any of this?

God has surely revealed this privileged information to her. She was a woman with a heart first devoted to the King of Heaven. She had a heart of gold. She tells him that the Lord will make him a “sure house” which we see later that God promised to “make [David] a house.” She mentions that God will do good to him and has appointed him as a “prince of Israel”, and later God tells David he will be “prince over [His] people Israel”.

Not only does she make this prophecy, but she cunningly or rather diplomatically presents David with reasons why he WILL NOT shed blood. I can just imagine David standing there just nodding his head, “yes, you’re right. I’m not going to do that!” like she’d hypnotized him!

She tells him, look, you’re not going to do this thing because God has already promised you the kingship! God is with you, there’s no need to harm anyone. You will have no cause of grief or pangs of conscience because you’re not going to kill anyone today.

Abigail saves not only her worthless husband, but she saves David from bloodguilt that day!

David’s response is, of course, thanksgiving to God for Abigail and for keeping him from doing evil. Then v. 35 “David received from her hand what she had brought him. And he said to her, ‘Go up in peace to your house…”

Abigail, after all that hurrying and rushing and making haste, waits until morning to tell her husband and he has a heart attack or a stroke, but v. 38 tells us “the LORD struck Nabal, and he died.”

David hears the news and acknowledges God’s justice over the death of Nabal. Then v. 39 says, “David sent and spoke to Abigail, to take her as his wife.” It’s like he thought, “man, I’ve got to have this woman!” I love how he goes and speaks to her himself – it’s the same word used in Ruth when she said Boaz “spoke kindly” to her (Ruth 2:13). The tone of voice is gentle!

Her response, though, is classic. She bows to the ground and replies, “Behold, your handmaid is a servant to wash the feet of the servants of the lord.” (v. 41)

Do you remember what the text said about Nabal? He was a very wealthy man (v. 2 with 3,000 sheep, 1,000 goats), portrayed as a king (v. 36), so Abigail most certainly would have been a prominent woman, not a servant. She carries herself as one with great strength, virtue, and power. She takes FIVE handmaidens with her. This shows she is a woman of high social class or rank. She would have been nothing like a “servant”. But she goes humbly, and THIS is the type of woman David marries! A heart of gold!

Every woman in Israel would have wanted to be the WIFE of the king! What a privilege! And to possibly carry his child, giving him an heir to the throne, would have been seen as the highest honor. Did Abigail have to pinch herself as she mounted her donkey and set off with her new husband, the soon-to-be king?

What humility she has though! Not once in the text do you ever get a sense that she seems like an entitled bridezilla. She’s not whiny, like we’ll see about Michal later on, and she never tries to place herself in higher places of honor. She must have been a major blessing in his life from the moment he met her until the moment she passed.

(*Jews esteem Abigail as one of the most righteous women of Israel, a wise and practical woman, and one of the 4 most beautiful women who ever lived. They also count her among the 7 women prophets of Israel.) http://jwa.org/encyclopedia/article/abigail-midrash-and-aggadah

Interestingly David picks up another wife while he’s out, named Ahinoam of Jezreel. (1 Sam 25:43) The chapter ends with the information about Michal being given to another man. 1 Sam 25:44

Saul had given Michal his daughter, David’s wife, to Palti (Paul-tee) the son of Laish (Lay-sh), who was of Gallim (Gal-im).”

She who loved David has been given to another man. I wonder how that sat in her now stormy heart.

But David was still a hunted man! Saul continued to pursue him, and so what does that mean for Abigail? She’s on this dangerous journey with him! It really makes me wonder if it was Abigail’s influence in his life that helps him to restrain himself against Saul.

He had already spared Saul’s life once right before meeting Abigail.

1 Sam 26:10-11 David finds Saul and has the opportunity to strike him again, but he tells his man

Do not destroy him, for who can put out his hand against the LORD’s anointed and be guiltless?…As the LORD lives, the LORD will strike him, or his day will come to die…The LORD forbid that I should put out my hand against the LORD’s anointed…”

Interesting that he now says with confidence, I don’t need to kill him, the Lord will take care of him. But I can remain guiltless. Those words from Abigail ringing in his ear:

evil shall not be found in you so long as you live. 29 If men rise up to pursue you and to seek your life, the life of my lord shall be bound in the bundle of the living in the care of the Lord your God. And the lives of your enemies he shall sling out as from the hollow of a sling. 30 And when the Lord has done to my lord according to all the good that he has spoken concerning you and has appointed you prince over Israel, 31 my lord shall have no cause of grief or pangs of conscience for having shed blood without cause…”

After this, however, David actually flees to be with the Philistines because of his fear of Saul, and it says in 1 Sam 27:3

“David lived with Achish (pronounced Aw-keesh) at Gath, he and his men, every man with his household, and David with his two wives, Ahinoam of Jezreel, and Abigail of Carmel, Nabal’s widow.”

David, his 600 men, all of their families, and all of David’s family! IN THE LAND OF THE ENEMY! Talk about a test of God’s promise. It’s as crazy as Abram going to sacrifice the Son of Promise! However, God is with David and gives him favor with this king of Gath.

David asks for favor from king Achish who grants his request by giving him the city of Ziklag. He ends up staying here for 1 year and 4 months (v. 7). What does he do to pass his time? He makes raids on the enemies of Israel but tells the Philistine king that he’s been raiding his own people (Judah, Jerahmeelites, and Kenites). He’s secretly getting rid of the enemy even as he’s in the enemy territory!

This Philistine king trusted him so much that he actually asks David and his men to go to war WITH HIM against ISRAEL (1 Sam 28:1-2). HOWEVER, the other kings of the Philistines would have nothing to do with David (1 Sam 29:3-5)! (I wonder if they remembered another Israelite who brought trouble on their people?! *cough* Samson *cough*)

Achish had to tell David he must leave at the urging of the other lords, so he goes.

But while David was away (fighting with Philistines), the Amalekites had made a raid against David’s city, Ziklag, and had burned it with fire, taking captive all the people, including David’s 2 wives! (1 Sam 30:1-5)

What horror this must have been for Abigail! But based on what we know of her, I can just picture her staying level-headed, perhaps working her diplomatic magic on these men too. It says that the Amalekites took everyone captive and didn’t kill anyone. It makes me wonder if Abigail told them, “look, you don’t need to kill anyone today…there’s no need to shed blood…just take us with you.” Perhaps she also knew that because God was with David, that he would come to their rescue. (That heart of gold devoted to the King of Heaven!)

1 Sam 30:6 tells us

David was greatly distressed, for the people spoke of stoning him, because all the people were bitter in soul…But David strengthened himself in the LORD his God.”

For him to be “greatly distressed” literally meant he was “in a very tight place” (sar). The same language is used of Saul in 28:15 when he went to consult a spiritist. Unlike Saul, David’s response was to “strengthen himself in the LORD.” (Brueggeman, p. 201)

What did it mean for David to strengthen himself in the Lord?

The word is chazaq (khaw-zak) and means to strengthen, prevail, be strong, become strong, be courageous, be firm, grow firm, be resolute. (Strong’s Concordance at biblestudytools.com) The word is used in other places in Scripture: (295 times!)

  • Deut 3:28 ‘But charge Joshua, and encourage and strengthen him, for he shall go over at the head of this people, and he shall put them in possession of the land that you shall see.’
  • Judges 16:28 Then Samson called to the Lord and said, “O Lord God, please remember me and please strengthen me only this once, O God, that I may be avenged on the Philistines for my two eyes.”
  • Psalm 27:14 Wait for the Lord; / be strong, and let your heart take courage; / wait for the Lord!
  • Nehemiah 6:9 For they all wanted to frighten us, thinking, “Their hands will drop from the work, and it will not be done.” But now, O God, strengthen my hands.

We know exactly how David strengthened himself because verses 7-10 tell us he inquired of the Lord with the ephod. He trusts God, knowing God will tell him what to do, and we can assume he is willing to listen and obey God.

Isn’t he refreshing?? Rather than acting brashly like Samson, he asks God what God would want him to do! Even though probably every fiber in his bones was aching to rescue his brides, he waits patiently to seek God.

When I am weak, then I am strong. How do I strengthen myself? By admitting my utter weakness and asking for God’s strength to take over!

2 Corinthians 12:9-10:

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”

We also have a clue what he was thinking because he writes Psalm 56 in response to what the Philistines did and what happened upon his return. 56:8-11:

You have kept count of my tossings;
put my tears in your bottle.
Are they not in your book?
Then my enemies will turn back
in the day when I call.
This I know, that God is for me.
10 In God, whose word I praise,
in the Lord, whose word I praise,
11 in God I trust; I shall not be afraid.
What can man do to me?

Again it sounds an awful lot like Abigail had become his inner voice. David, you know that God is for you! He has made you a sure house! If men rise up to pursue you, God will take care of you. He will make you prince of Israel. Do not be afraid.

Do you see why he was a man after God’s own heart? And do you also see how Abigail was the godly wife he needed??! GOLD!

But then we don’t sit around doing nothing, we act, just like David acted! (well not just like David. We aren’t going to kill a band of pagan enemies.) His actions reveal that he is aware God is acting on his behalf and will give him the victory. (Brueggeman, p. 202) This is faith and works working together.

Arnold writes, “The verb translated by the NIV as ‘found strength’ involves a reflexive element – ‘David strengthened himself. This expression emphasizes David’s personal faith…a faith that requires human response, though it is enabled by God (Eph. 2:8). Even though God graciously makes faith possible, it is up to us to respond to His grace.” (p. 389)

God did indeed strengthen David’s hand for it says in 1 Sam 30:17-18,

17 And David struck them down from twilight until the evening of the next day, and not a man of them escaped, except four hundred young men, who mounted camels and fled. 18 David recovered all that the Amalekites had taken, and David rescued his two wives.”

He truly was their knight in shining armor!

This narrative serves to contrast David the kingly hero with Saul, the defeated king, who dies in the battle against the Philistines. It also underscores God’s presence and power displayed in David’s obedient life.

But there is no rest for the weary, because only 3 days pass before David gets news that both Saul and his dear friend Jonathan have been killed by the Philistines (the same band whom he was going to fight with earlier). (2 Sam 1)

Instead of celebrating, David laments the passing of the king and of his friend. The kingship is his for the taking! He could have ridden out in all of his glory, but he doesn’t do that. He could have taken the throne because it certainly belonged to him!

Instead, he inquires of the Lord again in 2 Sam 2:1. And God tells him to go to HEBRON. 2 Sam 2:2-4 says,

So David went up there, and his two wives also, Ahinoam of Jezreel and Abigail the widow of Nabal of Carmel. And David brought up his men who were with him, everyone with his household, and they lived in the towns of Hebron. And the men of Judah came, and there they anointed David  king over the house of Judah.”

This is the second anointing of David, this time a public one. I wonder if Abigail watched with tears in her eyes as her prophecy began to unfold!

30 And when the Lord has done to my lord according to all the good that he has spoken concerning you and has appointed you prince over Israel”

He’s not king over all Israel yet, but it’s a start!

Now anointing in the Hebrew culture was a major cause for celebration. It was a solemn and sacred event. In Exodus 30:22-25 God gave them a specific blend of oils and spices for anointing the priests and tabernacle. The idea was that “the recipe is unique, so that everything and everyone belonging to Yahweh [would] share the same distinctive scent.” When the kings were anointed, the oil they used was a “pungent and durable perfume.” The fragrance would have persisted long after the anointing and would have stained the garments worn. The anointing “marked [the kings] for the divine service [to God].” And it was bound to the idea of holiness. We learn that David was anointed 3 times (first with his family, then here at Judah, and finally when he becomes king over all of Israel). (All from Dict. of the OT Historical Books)

David was the anointed one of God, chosen by God to be the prince over Israel. The term Messiah literally means “anointed one”. David was anointed to signify that he belonged to God. He would be a fragrant aroma to God.

When the people offered appropriate sacrifices, they were said to be a “pleasing aroma” to God. The aroma was pleasing in that it satisfied God’s wrath over their sins.

Likewise, the Messiah was the Anointed One who offered Himself as the sacrifice for our sins, making Himself a pleasing aroma to God. Even now Christ makes us a fragrant aroma of God for others to breathe in and receive the knowledge of God (2 Cor 2:14-16).

 

Now, here’s a map of Hebron’s location, just south of Jerusalem.

David Hebron

This map shows David’s “flight” from Saul:

David flight from Saul

Hebron actually has some history behind it. The city of Hebron is actually associated with Abraham, the patriarch with the promise. In Genesis 13:18 it says,

18 So Abram moved his tent and came and settled by the oaks of Mamre (pronounced Mam-ray), which are at Hebron, and there he built an altar to the Lord.”

Hebron is also a Levitical city of refuge! Joshua 21:13

13 And to the descendants of Aaron the priest they gave Hebron, the city of refuge for the manslayer, with its pasturelands,”

After the loss of their homes in Ziklag, David moves his wives to the city of refuge where God had promised Abram he would allow him to settle and make his descendants as numerous as the dust! Oh if Abraham could have seen his promise coming true in his great great great great grandson David!

{Stay tuned for Part 2 about Wise Abigail}

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